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Il Libro Cuore (forse) - Epidemia - - ()

22.10.2014
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: Il Libro Cuore (forse) - Epidemia, Federico M. Sardelli / .
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Il Libro Cuore (forse) - Epidemia
Io son felice ogni volta che giunge il venerdì, perché allora ci portano a desinare alla mensa dell'Istituto Cavicchi, quello dei bambini ciechi. Siamo tutti lieti quel giorno, perché si attraversa a piedi Piazza Conte Cavour proprio durante il giorno di mercato, ed è uno spasso vedere tutto quel lieto formicolio di massaje, mercanti, bambinetti, pederasti, barrocci ricolmi d'ogni sorta di mercanzia, poponi, ombrelli, anguille, capotti, pialle del 12, fagioli buccioni, scarpe da trotto, corregge di cuoio, paperi gonfi, pinoli, nottolini, cani, chiodi rampini, pere spadone, fischi, groppi, tappi, pioppi, calli, polli, ora mi sarei anche rotto i coglioni. Sicché anche ieri transitammo allegri allegri lungo questo ameno e chiassoso viale, chi intonando Giovin Bracconier, chi spiccando di soppiatto un chicco d'uva da una cesta, chi scaracchiando lesto dentro un tino d'acciughe, per giungere infine di fronte al monumentale edifizio che accoglie tutte quelle anime disgraziate e dolenti dei poveri ciechini.
Ivi entrammo col cuore gravido d'entusiasmo e cor un appetito gagliardo risvegliato dalla marcia e dal pregustare lo squisito minestrone di carrube che ci attendeva. Ad un gesto imperioso del nostro buon maestro dispeptico prendemmo tutti posto presso il tavolaccio nero che ci era riservato, mentre tutt'intorno a noi lunghe file di ciechini ritti e affamati si snodavano nello stanzone in attesa del pasto. Ad un altro severo gesto del nostro bravo maestro apoplettico ci rizzammo tutti d'un colpo per recitare la preghierina di ringraziamento, e subito, per il frastuono delle seggiole tranate, si staccò dalla parete di fondo il grande quadro di S. Rita cogli occhi nel bicchiere che centrò nella regione occipitale un ciechino mentre cercava di prender posto a tastoni proprio sotto la venerata icona. Suor Bruno trasalì, si fece il segno della croce e s'avventò a tempestare di nocchini nella regione occipitale il responsabile del sacrilego danno.
Noi intanto ci eravamo seduti affamati come lupi e battevamo il tavolo ritmicamente con i cucchiaj come tanti piccoli selvaggi. Ecco finalmente la minestra! Da un grande pentolone fumigante che suor Ugo aveva introdotto cor un carrello si diffondevano nello stanzone appetitosi effluvi di carrube lesse, segatura e formaggio, un po' di segale, pan secco, mirto, ramerino, finocchio, becco, pezzo di merda, t'aspetto fuori, e poi aromi di teste di pesce, ceci di Crimea, una presa di rapè, zampe di pollo, raschiatura di sedani, due lagrime di acetilene, costoline di micio, e ancora sentori di cacio baccellone, cassetto delle posate, ritorno a gola, fortore, acquajo, baule, ruto, rapa, sapa, topa, ora basta.
Il primo ad essere servito un ciechino vispo come una lince s'avventò con voracità sulla gamella ricolma, infilandoci il muso e aspirandone ampie cucchiajate di sbobba rovente. Noi guardavamo la scena con una certa invidia, perché eravamo sempre gli ultimi ad essere serviti. Beata fatalità! Non appena suor Ugo giunse a servire il decimo infelice, il primo cominciò di macchie rosse sul viso, a fare il verso di barbagianni e vomitare tutta la minestra sul colletto del secondo che intanto si era coperto di aculei, fischiava come un nibbio e si piegava ritmicamente a emettere delle scorregge che parevan colpi di spingardino agli indirizzi del terzo, tutto tinto d'un bel blu ciano che aveva intanto steso a raffreddare sul tavolo la lingua gialla e moveva a scatti il capo facendo tremolare la magnifica cresta pavonazza. Altri presero a nitrire; uno si copri tutto di piume grige e cominciò a sputare a mitraglia verso suor Gino, un altro gonfiava il petto come fanno i piccioni e intanto andava depositando sull'impianto una lunga teoria di stronzi versicolori.
Era scoppiata un'epidemia di tifo calmucco! E noi ci si trovava nel bel mezzo! Si seppe più tardi che il morbo s'era diffuso tramite quella gustosa zuppa perché qualcuno sicuramente l'inserviente nano Tvillo, capriccioso e vendicativo aveva pisciato nella marmitta prima che giungesse in tavola, guastandone il delicato equilibrio gastronomico e diffondendo chissà quali germi perniciosi. Sia come si voglia, noi tutti a quella vista fuggimmo terrorizzatati rovesciando seggiole, scodelle, suore e ciechini, per giungere finalmente all'aria aperta, lontani dall'epidemia. Allora il nostro bravo maestro itterico ci radunò attorno a lui come un buon padre e ci disse:
- Figliuoli. Oggi voi avete corso un serio pericolo. La vostra vita è stata posta a repentaglio, ma la provvidenza vi ha voluto proteggere, facendo sì che il morbo colpisse quegli infelici, che tanto loro sono già disgraziati, capirai che differenza.
E comunque rimanga inteso che se ritrovo il Baluganti a pisciare nella marmitta gli fo una nota di demerito sul registro!
Quando giungemmo nei pressi della nostra scuola digiuni e scossi, vidi da lontano mia madre che m'attendeva preoccupata cor un fagottino di carrube in mano, e corsi a gettarmi fra le sue braccia mentre intanto pensavo fra me: ma te guarda che giornata di merda s'è passato per colpa di questi infelici... stai a vedere che portano anche male.
Mi tastai la borsa dei coglioni dalla tasca del cappotto, e sgranocchiando una gustosa carruba presi a sgambettare verso casa.

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Cest bien http://www.mkoutletsaleol.top ce que je fais, http://www.topchristianlouboutinf.com affirma Mo

http://www.uggpascherlfr.com
chenlina
chenlina :
0
16.05.2018 05:34   #
chenlina20180516
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